Laying wide awake listening to the rain fall on our roof (and Sean lightly snoring beside me). Isn’t rain on the tin roof meant to be relaxing, therefore help me sleep!? Why am I awake? The latter (snoring) obviously not relaxing haha.
I’ve picked up my phone as I once again I can’t sleep. It’s been happening a bit lately, nothing more frustrating. Since Pandora has now shut down in Aus, there goes my ‘go to’ sleep radio station. So instead tonight I write. I do find my best thoughts and therefore sometimes writing, does happen in the wee hours of the morning though. So I guess it’s not all that bad. I woke up to Reeve crying earlier and couldn’t get over the moonlight outside, it looked like day time. Got to love a full moon (unless you’re the poor kid in Brighton that was recently attacked by sea lice!). Reevie who’s nearly one still isn’t a great sleeper. But I’m blaming his teeth. Nightmare. AND on the way back to bed I turned and hit my leg on the wooden bed end 😫. Huge bang, woke up Sean, hurt myself and now I can feel a BIG bruise coming. Just what I need before the holiday.
Today, well I guess technically yesterday now. I had my follow up appointment from my MRI with my Oncologist at Royal Melbourne. I’ve been feeling quite good of late so I was very optimistic and looking forward to the “looks all good Donna, see you next month” spiel but unfortunately today that was not the case 😔.
Unfortunately Terry hasn’t fucked off like we’d hoped (very optimistic I know after 4 rounds of chemo, but you have to be) so it isn’t good news BUT it’s not bad yet either. Must remain positive.
Basically my scan showed a “flair” in the contrast scan (which they inject mid MRI) which basically means (according my Oncologist) it may be a temporary “pseudo effect” just from treatment or unfortunately it may be something more sinister. Likely it’s first option however. Fingers crossed 🤞🏼. But we will have to just wait and see. They need to wait a week and discuss further with radiologists, surgeons & the oncology team.
We will then go in next week to meet Kate Drummond (head of the neurosurgery department – whom I met a few months back prior to starting chemo) again to discuss findings and make a plan. It may mean surgery, it may mean just continuing chemo like nothing happened. If it’s just continuing chemo I will have another MRI after 2 months and see where we are at. If it’s surgery, it may be soon – I bloody hope not, I’m on the holiday countdown!!! And I need a break baaaadly as if this year and winter hasn’t been bad enough!
If it still hasn’t settled post the next MRI, surgery is then again on the agenda.
So basically now, we wait. I won’t start chemo today as planned. I’ll hold off until I meet with Kate next week. Not ideally what we were after but hey, the whole thing is not ideal either.
It’s fair to say it was VERY upsetting news and what we least expected considering my last “spectacular” MRI result.
My very sweet sister in law Silv had thoughtfully given me some extra cash over the weekend for a ‘celebration brunch’ post the hospital visit today. After lots of tears with the Oncologist and my mascara exiting stage left at a rapid rate and feeling generally pretty shitty. Unfortunately we didn’t make the ‘celebration brunch’ instead home to play with our gorgeous boys who seem to make everything ok. Seeing their happy smiling faces is an instant fix…..well kind of, not literally haha I wish! The celebration brunch Silv will hopefully come next Wednesday after our meeting with Kate with the news “no surgery just yet, the said ‘flair’ was just that, a ‘pseudo effect’ and no cause for concern” well that’s the style of convo I’m hoping/praying will go down. I’m not against surgery I’ve done I once I can do it again but just ideally not now, I’ve got so much planned in these next few weeks – boys birthdays, family visiting from qld & my holiday I don’t want to miss out on.
My holiday I hope I will be going on still, is to Thailand with a good girlfriend Alex for 5 days/nights of warm relaxing bliss coupled in with lots of massages, pool side lounging, yummy food (sorry diet your out for a few days) a cocktail or two and lots of well needed belly laughs. I cannot wait! So please Terry be kind and let me do this you asshole. You’ve taken enough already.
I also must thank all my beautiful #donnassupportsquad ladies as you have personally helped me take this trip to Thailand with the “pamper fund” funds.
This weekend coming you may have seen me mention that Seany & Silv are running the 14km City2Surf in Sydney. I’ve set them up a fundraising page and are still short of my $1500 target to raise funds for the Cure Brain Cancer foundation. If you’d like to help us reach this target, I’d be so grateful. All donations are tax deductible (over $2) and will assist in funding vital research so other people just like me don’t have to be given such a grim diagnosis. Click here to donate!
After my shitty day today, my step brother Ryan who lives in Sydney himself (well technically now in the USA) offered to fly me up to Sydney for the weekend too and be there for Sean & Silv in the race. One thing led to another and now I’m going, but I’m also doing it too, along with Ryan. Although we will be walking. So another good reason to donate. Please help me reach my target here!
I’ll update you on how we go and I’m sure there will be plenty of pictures to share.
For now, that’s all and I’m feeling sleepy again. So I must sleep.
Thanks for your continued positive feedback on my blog (I’m still very new at this writing game) and thoughts and positivity always being sent my way in the brain stakes.